A wilderness is an inhospitable, uninhibited, uncultivated, and neglected place, not somewhere you would go for your honeymoon. The word also refers to a region or spot in its natural state, not yet domesticated. 

So why on earth is God sending his chosen people into an inhospitable, neglected, and frankly wild situation still today? A place where even His servants have trouble hearing His voice or sensing His presence, a place where no one really wants to go because it is not comfortable or pleasurable, a place where things are strange and unusual yet exactly how they are supposed to be.

It's as simple as the chicken crossing the road to get to the other side. Obvious, you would think. Why go to the wilderness? To get more wild. To have a Wilder Ness about you. To go back to the natural way which seems so foreign now. Our relationship with God should be wild, unrestrained. Sometimes, we need to rediscover what we really believe, if our faith stands even when we cannot feel the source of it. The wilderness is such a place to revive our dying souls. God is not a feeling.

I have come to love C.S. Lewis, as previously mentioned on this blog, with a sincere passion. He explains God in ways that I would never have been able to grasp by myself. Let me tell you the supply of these ingenious revelations that I have been having, The Chronicles of Narnia, a child's fantastical collection of novels (The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe being the most famous). Phenomenal books.

In the Magician's Nephew, the lion Aslan (God) creates a world which comes to life at the sound of His glorious voice and everything is good. However, much to Aslan's knowledge, evil entered the world quickly after its foundation in the form of a witch accidentally transported in by two children, a crazed old man, a cabby, and the cabby's horse. 

Magic rings that the children had acquired from the boy's uncle (the crazed old man) allowed the kids to pass between worlds along with whatever other living creatures they were in contact with. In an attempt to get the evil witch out of their own world (to which they had also accidentally brought her into on one of their adventures), they used little discretion and ended up in this new world just at the beginning of creation.

The witch recognizing Aslan's superior power ran into the forest to build her strength before her return. Even in the foreknowledge that the evil witch which they led into the world would one day almost destroy it, He gives the humans a solid chance for redemption and the children as well as the cabby and his horse choose to follow that path. The old man, stubborn and unwilling to believe that a lion could talk, much less sing, though the lion sang the world to life right in front of his very eyes, would choose otherwise. 

After a while of choosing not to believe in the lion being anything but an ordinary lion, He stopped being able to hear Aslan's voice and could only distinguish a fierce but animalistic growling. He still revered the lion and feared him, but now without the perk of knowing him.

God will be to you what you make Him to be. If you limit Him long enough, you will lose the ability to see his unlimitlessness. 

The Chronicles of Narnia entreats me to be wild when I get stuck in the wilderness, and what a wonderful idea.

Being good doesn't make God choose you and being bad doesn't make God choose you.  God uses whom He chooses and how He chooses is a mystery.  He uses High Priests and prostitutes, no attempt can come close to changing His mind.  Trying to trick God is not like tricking people; He is God who created people.  He knows His servants.

Galatians 6:7 says, "Do not be deceived, God cannot be mocked."  People are so arrogant.  They think that they can actually mock God.  Nope, He cannot be mocked and He needs no defense because of this.  We are not His defense; He is ours.  How many times have you come to God's rescue?  People will choose to believe with or without you.  News flash: We are not indispensable.  The faith of others does not ride on us.  In John chapter 3, Jesus tells us that he was not sent to condemn the world, but regardless those who do not believe in God's only son stand condemned because they do not believe in the only true hope.  Even when people mocked Jesus at the cross, glory was sent to the Father.  They thought they were deriding him, but they were only deriding and condemning themselves.

God loves you.  He is not super pumped about your ministry or your choices or your righteousness; all things good come from Him anyways.  He loves you apart from everything you have done or ever will do because He does not care about what you do. He just cares about you.

Philippians 4:8 "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things."  There is power in thought.  If you speak positively over a bottle of water, the molecular structure changes.  Unfortunately, if you speak negatively over a bottle of water, the molecular structure changes.

2 Corinthians 10:5 "We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ."  Considering truth destroys lies.  Thinking on the noble causes you to clash with the ignoble.  Whatever is right is always in combat with whatever is wrong.  If you are clinging to purity even in your mind, impurity must flee.  The power to tear down or build up all dwells in that space between your ears.

Today Brittany and I were typing up forms and letters of great importance to the orphan center at our new base so that the field workers could get to the field.  As we went along, we were unexpectedly excited to come across some names that we were familiar with from our time in Busia.  Then, also unexpectedly, we were very disappointed and angry.  A few of the children that were listed were legitimate orphans and a few were making their case sound much worse than their reality.  People abuse the system everywhere.  Don't they know that others need that money?  Some of the orphans have lost both parents to AIDS or some other horrible incident and have no living relatives so they are constantly moved from place to place because no one has an obligation to them or responsibility for them.  They have nothing and walk forever to try to get an education while tackling more chores at home than I would ever dream of undertaking.  Those children need sponsors.  Of course, that sort of case would move up on the priority list but the little money that is dispatched to the children who do not need it is just... something when the other child is starving and dying of AIDS.

God is not a man; God is not a white man.

Thank you for making every moment of my life possible.  I know that all of my appreciation probably seems a bit impersonal via blog for which I apologize because I really am more thankful than you will ever know.

Our time in Mexico meant a lot of growth for me.  It was a time of just thinking about what I really believe, playing with babies like Oscarito, and the occasional trip to the downtown plaza or an impoverished village to do some evangelical outreach. Much like the States, this life was perfectly acceptable and predictable. Amen.

Such is not the case in Eastern Africa.  Nothing prompt or predictable would fit in here.  Between Kenya and uganda I can't say that I would have ever previously referred to anything casual here as being normal, average or easy at home.  Even on those lazy days when all we have to do is pull together a crusade, we are dragging.  The heat which apparently your body is supposed to get used to continues to affect us and burn our poor once white skin.  We are constantly watched by passing strangers, neighbors, friends, whatever, because we are "pretty" or unusual.  Everyone apologizes to us when we slip on a rock.  Why? Because it is not my fault, but it is.  Walking forever is wonderful until you just don't want to walk one day because you can see the sweat through your pants.  People are sick, but they are strong.  The air is heavy with oppression and the burden of incivility, but people do not want change.  Some do.  Life here is difficult and they all know it, and so did we, I guess. 

But now this is our life, and it is difficult.  However,God knows what He is doing.  These people may have the disadvantages of a society that no one would consider modern, but they have blessings that they do not recognize.  The scenery is gorgeous, if these people cannot see that there is a God than I don't know who can.  Their stuff doesn't get in the way.  Their laws don't hold them back.  Every public school has chapel time allotted.  Modesty runs the culture in a weird way.  Surviving is key for them, and it means Hakuna Matata for anything but life itself.

Surely, I thought this doom and gloom spirit wasn't over the church but the church in East Africa is much like the church in America, give or take some movement.  They like to dance when they are awake.  They live. They breathe.  They pray.  They are trapped.  This place is so caught up in doing things right that they have missed the concept of grace.  They are so greedy that they have blinded themselves to what giving really is.  They are so stuck on telling people about Jesus that they forget who He is; they forget to love people.  How many people in the church are missing the point? The pastor of the church we were at this week had two wives.  Now, before you go crazy, let me tell you that this is not a common occurence in the church here but an exception to the rule.  We were absolutely appalled, but we have homosexual pastors amidst American congregations and if the Africans knew, they would think we were a strange cult going under the guise of Christianity.  So, this wonderful Easter we were taken back to the basics when we celebrated the rising victory of our King very much alone.

John 11:25-26  Jesus said to her,"I am the resurrection and the life.  He who believes in Me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in Me will never die.  Do you believe this?"

(This reminds me, inevitably, of Three Musketeers)